Social Awareness Project #3: Poem on bullying

I feel them staring at me
I don’t have to be a mind reader,
to know of me they think poorly
I don’t have to turn my head,
to know that they are whispering
Echoes in my mind, the words they said
I don’t have to hear,
to know they are calling me names
It makes me want to cower in fear
I don’t have to be there,
because they just
don’t care

But what they don’t know
is how much I remember of what they say
They don’t have to show
for me to know they hate me
It’s how I cry at night
until I sleep,
with nobody in sight
It’s how I try
to prove to myself,
that someone cares and it’s not a lie
And then it’s how they disprove
and break my efforts,
showing there’s nothing to prove
It’s how sometimes I feel
that all I am is a useless person,
which turned out to be real
It’s how I often wonder if they
would miss me if I was gone,
But they would rather have me gone they say

Then I think
Wouldn’t it be easier to just jump?
Or to lay my bleeding wrist in the sink?
Or to pull the trigger of the gun,
and destroy my own heart for them?
Because it’s much less work than having to run
and my legs have tired
I have nowhere to run
and my heart is no longer admired

But then I stop
Maybe I can prove myself wrong
Maybe I think and I let my hand drop
and put my knife away
I know I’m lying to myself
But there might be another way
And until I rule out the other paths
I promise I will stay
So tell me how to endure their wrath.


    When I was writing this poem, I was thinking about self-harm and why somebody might be pushed to inflict self-harm or even committing suicide. Bullying is a common factor of self-harm or suicide. Being insecure and lacking self-confidence also leads to self-harm. I put myself in the shoes of someone who was being bullied to the point where they were thinking of self-harm or committing suicide. I listed the factors of why somebody might think about this in the poem as well as in the end, the person trying to seek help. I feel that nobody deserves to feel that they are so useless that they would harm themselves or think about killing themselves. In some cases, if somebody had noticed or helped them, the person wouldn’t have killed themselves. This inspired me to write this poem.